Sunday, November 27, 2005


In our life there is a single color, as on an artist`s palette,
which provides the meaning of life and art.
It is the color of love.
...Marc Chagall

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven." Ecc. 3:1

Thursday, November 24, 2005

OMG if anyone reading this has extra cash they'd be willing to spare, please please please can you get this for me??? I'd be forever grateful!!! Truly! Right now I am too poor to afford to buy Charlotte Bronte's SIGNED!!! (yes peeps! Signed!) letter, considering how many loans I'd have to pay before I could actually break even, but seriously, I'd give anything to get my hands on this memorabilia!!! See it here

Sunday, November 20, 2005

I am going to do my art project on the Brontes! ...I mean Charlotte lol!
Actually I am trying to decide between Jane Eyre or Villette...will prolly go with Villette. I feel I need to give voice to Lucy...I NEED to get her out there. Jane and the Red Room is great too..but some how I feel there's more calling for Villette precisely because Lucy seems like she is NOT calling...when she really does. (if that maakes any sense).
I am going to call it "Who are you Lucy Snowe?" and give a series of sketches describing the different facets of Lucy: Polly, "brooding child", teacher, lover, "dazzling", imaginative (nun), "directress of her own destiny". I think I can go far with this project...provided I get a better sense of HOW I want to portray this...

In other news: got pissed again today. Was at a party a friend threw in Boston. It was nice being there instead of moping around in my room. However, there were some things I simply could not endure!
Firstly, my brain had SO much to engage I'd have loved to incorporate art into everything.. in fact this one time I made a comment like "look at the layers of action within an action" referring to a friend taking pictures of other friends taking pictures. And the only retort I got was "OMG what? there you go again. contemplating too much. why do it?"

huh?? excuse me!!! What is wrong with my contemplating like that? What is wrong with my seeing things a differnet way? What is wrong with my wanting more out of what I see? Why do people look down and silence me like this?
And another thing...language. All of them talked in a diff. language, leaving me out of it...or rather I feel left out, always have...

so much for an evening..

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Let me just say:
Prudes are F***** annoying!!!! They piss me off!!!!!! I just want to shove this in their faces!!! Why the F**** would you HIDE your friggin FEELINGS??? or do you not feel at all???

Why the HELL do I feel so ALONE???
Why is there NO ONE I can be myself around? Why will NO ONE listen and understand me?

I HATE them!!! They make me sick!!!! Get out of my face!!!

Sunday, November 13, 2005

so SL is OVER!!! I can hardly believe it!!! *cries*
I really do feel sad thinking about is my last time at W and the Senior Dance and slideshow was so poignant...
I dunno...I might try and go over to some South Asian events to dance..but other than that...when will I get to do something like this again??? hmm unless its at my wedding....but I can't even fathom any prospects of that happening anytime soon...

Other than that, I had a nice time doing SL! oh and I also watched P&P yesterday. OMG that Darcy dude was HOT!

Friday, November 11, 2005

More venting!!!!!!!!!!!!
I just got back from SL practice!!! and its already 12:22 AM!!!!!!!!!
I've got a paper and project due tomorrw before 8:15!!!! OMG I so wanna sleep *cries*

Anyways...I must say tho...taking part in this show has made me tons happier than I used to be. I almost feel sad thinking it will be over so soon...
Despite bouts of mellowness, this show makes me smile, dance, forget, dream!!!

Yay Shruti Laya!!

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

OMG Gaaaaaaaaaaah!!!!!!!!!!!
Shruti Laya rehearsal were so damn loooong!!! I stayed from 7 till 1!!! the longest I've ever been if I remember right...
OMG it better be worth it!!

Monday, November 07, 2005

Another FAB Bronte Poem
(I am writing a paper on this one ;-)

To Imagination
---Emily Bronte---

When weary with the long day's care,
And earthly change from pain to pain,
And lost, and ready to despair,
Thy kind voice calls me back again:
Oh, my true friend! I am not lone,
While then canst speak with such a tone!

So hopeless is the world without;
The world within I doubly prize;
Thy world, where guile, and hate, and doubt,
And cold suspicion never rise;
Where thou, and I, and Liberty,
Have undisputed sovereignty.

What matters it, that all around
Danger, and guilt, and darkness lie,
If but within our bosom's bound
We hold a bright, untroubled sky,
Warm with ten thousand mingled rays
Of suns that know no winter days?

Reason, indeed, may oft complain
For Nature's sad reality,
And tell the suffering heart how vain
Its cherished dreams must always be;
And Truth may rudely trample down
The flowers of Fancy, newly-blown:

But thou art ever there, to bring
The hovering vision back, and breathe
New glories o'er the blighted spring,
And call a lovelier Life from Death.
And whisper, with a voice divine,
Of real worlds, as bright as thine.

I trust not to thy phantom bliss,
Yet, still, in evening's quiet hour,
With never-failing thankfulness,
I welcome thee, Benignant Power;
Sure solacer of human cares,
And sweeter hope, when hope despairs!

Saturday, November 05, 2005

So I was reading poems by the Brontes and I came across this one by Anne that I particularly like:

Lines Composed In A Wood On A Windy Day - Poem by Anne Bronte

My soul is awakened, my spirit is soaring
And carried aloft on the wings of the breeze;
For above and around me the wild wind is roaring,
Arousing to rapture the earth and the seas.

The long withered grass in the sunshine is glancing,
The bare trees are tossing their branches on high;
The dead leaves beneath them are merrily dancing,
The white clouds are scudding across the blue sky

I wish I could see how the ocean is lashing
The foam of its billows to whirlwinds of spray;
I wish I could see how its proud waves are dashing,
And hear the wild roar of their thunder to-day!

Thursday, November 03, 2005

Do not fear death, but rather the unlived life. You don't have to live forever. You just have to live. And she did.
~Tuck Everlasting by Natalie Babbitt~

To make the journey and not fall deeply in love... well, you haven't lived a life at all. But you have to try... because if you haven't tried, you haven't lived.
~ Meet Joe Black ~

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

My Heart Only Hurts When I'm Breathing~Shania Twain

Hope life's been good to yousince you've been gone
I'm doin' fine now--I've finally moved on
It's not so bad--I'm not that sad
I'm not surprised just how well I survived
I'm over the worst, and I feel so alive
I can't complain--I'm free again

[Chorus:]And it only hurts when I'm breathing
My heart only breaks when it's beating
My dreams only die when I'm dreaming
So, I hold my breath--to forget
Don't think I'm lyin' 'round cryin' at night
There's no need to worry, I'm really all right
I've never looked back--as a matter of fact

[Repeat Chorus]

It only hurts when I breathe
Mmm, no, I've never looked back--as a matter fact

[Repeat Chorus]

Hurts when I'm breathing
Breaks when it's beating
Die when I'm dreaming
It only hurts when I breathe

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

I found this on a random blog (
"Writers don't write about themselves because they think anyone actually cares that much. They are banking on the fact that in the process of wrestling something out of their own darkness, they can connect with that which is common to someone else. Doesn't have to be everybody, either. Just somebody"......John Fischer